#momlife in Him

Heading into this week with gusto, I was hopeful that we were putting our five-week streak of sporadic sickness behind us.  I made an effort to spend part of my Sunday getting organized with a plan and a to-do list.  The past month has been a whirlwind of a new school for my older boys, Christmas, a ski trip, birthdays, and, unfortunately, intermittent sicknesses.  I was reinvigorated and ready to reset.

At 3am Sunday night, my three-year-old Benji walks into our bedroom and says his tummy hurts and throws up – somehow the sweet thing makes it to the toilet in the midst of my husband's and my half-awake, stumbling confusion.  His preschool teacher at church had told me earlier that day that he had licked the bottom of his shoes in defiance during class, so I couldn’t help but think this was payback.  Monday was a holiday, and we took it easy, thinking we were on the up-and-up headed into Tuesday.  Tuesday morning arrives, and we are all dressed, ready to go, for one of those days you’re going to leave the house at 7:30 and not return until evening – lunches are packed, everything’s organized and in the car.  As we are all getting on shoes, Benji throws up all over the kitchen.  “Ok God… I guess this is what You have for me today… again.”  I reschedule the day’s plans, some of them having already been rescheduled 3+ times before, and I get into sweats.  My oldest comes home later that day with a fever and is down and out with some other type of bug.  What?!?  Why?!?  I just want to get a few things done and get out of the house!!!

It’s now Thursday, and I’ve literally cancelled everything I had on the calendar this week.  I’ve been inside on these beautiful Colorado 50-degree days.  I’ve cleaned up every bodily fluid you can name except for blood, thank God.  As I’m getting my oldest tucked into bed for a nap, I turn on his music and an upbeat Bible verse song comes on.  I hum along to it and realize I’m singing “in everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you”.  Haha, ok God, You’re funny!  I see what You’re doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says: “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”

When God speaks to you like that, you better think and pray on it.  So, with a third cup of coffee (why not?) and an unknown amount of time until I would get interrupted, I sat down with God.

Lord, I rejoice that You sent Your one and only Son for me.  I certainly can’t achieve the perfection You require on my own.  Hello?  I can’t even help but be frustrated that my poor kid is sick and that I have to give up what I want.  I rejoice that with Jesus as my Lord and Savior, I know where I am going (heaven-bound, baby!) and that the sufferings of this life are not compared to what is coming (Romans 8:18).  I can’t wait to see You, Jesus, face to face!  God, Your grace is sufficient for me.  What You’ve done through Your Son on the cross and through His resurrection from the dead is all I really need.  You have done so much more though.  You somehow, for some reason, want fellowship with me.  You WANT to spend time with ME!  You are here with me and I’m with You, and whatever You allow in my life, I just want to please You while I’m in it.

I can’t pray every waking moment of the day, but I can certainly talk to You and trust You all day long, knowing You are always there.  You just want me to abide with You and come to You with my rejoicing and thanksgiving but also with my heartaches and frustrations – the big ones and the small ones.

Lord, I am thankful for You and the blessings You have so abundantly poured out.  Thank You for Your Word that sustains me and leads me through the ups and downs.  Thank You that the time I spend in Your Word on good days helps prepare me for bad days like this.  Thank You for Disney+, that I can so easily entertain my kids when they are sick so I can spend time with You to get refreshed and be ready to serve them the next time bodily fluid erupts out or when they are so full of energy despite the thermometer saying 102.  Thank You that we only have tummy bugs and head colds.  Thank You for knowing exactly what I’d need, before I knew I even needed it, and for reminding me of Your love for me through my Bible studies this week.  Thank You for a husband who helps take some of the burden so I can take a bath or go to church.  Thank You for mid-week church service, solid Bible teaching, and a fellowship of believers who loves our family and provides comfort and encouragement when I need it most.  Thank You for friends that check in on me, send funny memes, and bring flowers just because.  Thank You for making me a mom  – that I can get just a glimpse of the unconditional love You have for me, and thank You for teaching me, through motherhood, to be more flexible and gracious in circumstances I can’t control that are, quite frankly, gross.  Thank You also for my mom who loved me through it all too.

Then verses 19-22 say: “Do not quench the Spirit. Do not despise prophecies. Test all things; hold fast what is good. Abstain from every form of evil.”

Oh man!  I quench the Spirit when I’m frustrated, angry, harsh, or even when I just withdraw and am a quiet pouter.  I don’t want to do that.  Lord, fill me afresh with Your Spirit, that I may pour love, patience, and kindness on these precious children, even when they puke at 3am.

I will delight in Your Word, Lord, and will mediate on it day and night (Psalm 1:2), and I will not despise it.  I will hold fast to Your Word as You are good, and You know what’s best for me because You know all of me – the past, present, and future – and You created me for a purpose.  I will do my best to test all things against what You say in Your Word and will try to abstain from what is evil, but You know I will screw up.  When I do, I will repent and return to You, because You are good.

In texting with mom friends this week, it’s been abundantly clear that many families are dealing with sickness, and I so wanted to share how God has comforted me in hopes it comforts some of you too (or at least makes you laugh at the "joys" of motherhood, ha!)  You are loved!

“You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You.” Isaiah 26:3

“But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31

Prayer Series 7: Know Him

One of my favorite verses in the Bible is in 1 Chronicles when King David is announcing that his young and inexperienced son Solomon will become Israel’s next king, and he is communicating that God wants Solomon to complete the mighty work of building the temple.  After David communicates God’s plans for Solomon to the leaders of Israel, he exhorts his son and future king of Israel with this verse:  

"As for you, my son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve Him with a loyal heart and with a willing mind; for the LORD searches all hearts and understands all the intent of the thoughts. If you seek Him, He will be found by you; but if you forsake Him, He will cast you off forever.” - 1 Chronicles 28:9

I love this verse because God’s heart for how we love Him, serve Him, and seek Him first is all here.  Also, David, a loving father with the experience of being the greatest king of Israel and a man after God’s own heart, in his final years chose to exhort his beloved son with these words of wisdom.  Bottomline is, this verse is WISDOM, and it starts with “KNOW the God of your father.” 

The Hebrew word for “know” is yada,` which means to be acquainted with, to know by experience, to recognize, or to consider.  It's a relationship!  If you really think about it, God knows more about you than you know about yourself.  He created you, He’s omnipresent and omniscient (He is always present and knows everything), He sees your outward actions, He even knows your thoughts, and He knows your tomorrow.  What I love about this verse is it goes even further and says God knows your heart and understands the intent of your thoughts.  Yikes!  He knows our deepest motivations.  He knows ALL.  Furthermore, what always blows my mind is that He knows each and every person in the world on this same level and loves each one.  WOW!

So, obviously, you can’t hide anything from God, and He loves you right where you are at today regardless of your sin, your state-of-mind, your intentions, or your attitude.  Further in the verse, it says “if YOU SEEK Him, He will be found by you.”  It’s up to us to seek Him.  He is and always will be right there and available, just wanting to spend time with us.  We are wired with a soul that thirsts to spend time with God as it’s in our original DNA - the “Lord God walked in the garden in the cool of the day” wanting to spend time with Adam and Eve, but they were ashamed and avoided His presence because of sin (Gen. 3:8).  We are sinful because it’s our nature and it’s so easy to avoid His presence because our sinful nature separates us from His presence – we are thinking more about ourselves, our comforts, our “need” for sleep, our busy schedules, what we need to do today, how to get ahead, etc. etc, etc.

God gave us free will - free will to seek Him or forsake Him.  It’s our choice, and it has eternal implications.  He just wants to spend time in relationship with us.  He already knows all of us, so we need to know Him to have this relationship.  He is good all of the time, He wants to teach us, encourage us, bless us, grow us, change us, make us more like Him, and help us glorify Him so others can come to salvation and know truth through our lives.  Understanding that we were made to have a relationship with God and that prayer is the method for how we talk to God, prompts me to consider my heart and approach to “knowing God”. 

Yes, the “components” of prayer we’ve discussed in this blog series so far are all important, including: praise, thankfulness, praying scripture, repentance, and obedience, and we should challenge ourselves to make a habit of incorporating them into our prayer lives on a regular basis.  But don’t approach prayer with a checklist either.  Check your heart.  What is the motivation of your heart and the intent of your thoughts?  Is it to know Him?  Is it to acquaint yourself more with God’s heart and will?  Is it so you can recognize and consider His purpose and plan for your life because His thoughts are greater? 

Here’s a practical example considering prayer before Bible study.  In Matt’s powerful Rocket Fuel study a few weeks back, he said the first step of Bible study is quieting your own spirit.  You can do this and should do this through prayer.  I don’t know about you, but my spirit is LOUD!  My mind is always swirling with the things I need to do today, the people I need to call/text, emotions, etc…  This is one of the reasons I study the Bible in the morning, because my spirit is naturally a little quieter.  I haven’t fully engaged in email, texts, social media, the news, my kids aren’t awake, and my fully-packed day isn’t in full swing yet.  It is so much harder for me to quiet my spirit for an afternoon or evening Bible study.  It can be done, but it’s harder.  Regardless, whenever you study the Bible, make sure you quiet your spirit through prayer. 

What does “quiet your spirit” mean?  Purpose in your heart and mind to seek God first and suppress your flesh through prayer.  Start with a heart to know God to get acquainted with Him, not the other way around.  Praise God for who He is, and take time to be grateful for all He’s done, putting yourself in a place of submission, ready to receive from the God of the Universe who is spending time with YOU.  Ask God to teach you, correct you, grow you, show you more of Himself, change you, reveal sin in your life, show you how to love others, prepare you for the day/week/months ahead, and for you to have an ear to listen and obey Him.  Whatever you do, don’t jump into a Bible study with a loud spirit that is focused on yourself to check “do Bible study” off your list.  God wants to spend time with YOU.  He wants you to KNOW HIM.  If you really wanted to get to know a new friend, would you say “Ok, you have 30 minutes. Make me feel good please”?  No!  You would make it a priority to spend quality time with that friend.

Remember, the purpose of prayer is communication between you and God.  Keep it simple, come to Him and SEEK Him with a motivation to KNOW Him.  He already knows ALL of you, so our place is to simply come to Him, to quiet our fleshly loud spirits, let His Spirit and presence in, just spending time with Him listening and meditating on His Word, with a heart ready to serve Him and not ourselves. 

"Come to Me, all [you] who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” - Matthew 11:28

“Be still, and know that I [am] God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” - Psalms 46:10